Success!!!

okay, so i can't remember if i said anything about feeling like my whole world is about waiting for something to happen...but guess what??? now it has!!! i have been accepted to the university into the education program!!! i'm so excited! i can't believe it...this is something i've been working towards since i graduated from highschool...so, for ten years now...and now i've been accepted, and i am going back to school...kinda seems anti climatic...

i've been feeling kind of lost this week...all i can think of is moving back to calgary (finally) and going back to school...and moving in with Jon (eek!)...as weird as this may sound, i've never been good with change, and now i'm changing almost every aspect of my life in one summer. i feel like i'm actually an adult (or supposed to be one) and i'm not quite sure what i'm supposed to be doing or feeling...

i am feeling frustrated, because i feel like i'm stuck at the moment...stuck in a house that is starting to drive me crazy, stuck in a job that i'm bored out of my mind in...and there is a light at the end of the tunnel, but as close as it, it is still so far...

so, life is amazing and at the same time suffocating...i am a walking paradox...(i was going to say oxymoron, but i know where Joie would go with that one)...my brain is having a hard time processing my thoughts and feelings, and poor Jon is suffering, because i've been very quite and introverted and unfortunately i need more time to come to terms with what is going on in my head. i love the guy so much, and i'm so lucky to have him in my life...i can't wait to be able to see him every day...

okay, i need to stop wallowing...i think i may go lose myself in a book...feel like i'm someone else for a time, give my brain a rest.

goodnight to y'all out there in blogger land!

Lindsay

it's been a very looooonnnggg time...

okay, so i've been slacking in the blogging deptartment...oops...nobody's perfect...

i guess that i've been trying to deal with all my issues internally. i've always been a very private person...and to share my woes goes against the personality that i've been displaying for my whole life...but lately i've gone through some changes, i'm growing, and i've become very short tempered (for me...for anyone else i guess i would just appear normal)...

now that i sound like i'm about to throw myself off a bridge, lets look on the brighter side of things, shall we? life is actually pretty good right now! i've got a job in a time where a lot of people are losing them...not that i think this recession will last long, the price of gas is already going up...but it's a pretty cushy job. the worst that i can say about it is that i'm usually completely bored at work. so really, i'm getting paid pretty good money to sit on my behind all day...too bad the sitting is making the behind quite huge, but i'm trying to focus on the good here. because of the good money i've been able to pay off some bills...even the ones that have accumulated within this last year. i went to europe, and had an amazing time!!! sometimes it seems like it was all a dream! i saw so much in such a short time! i can't wait to go again!

also, and i can't overlook this, i've found an amazing guy who i love with all my heart! it's scary sometimes to think about how much i care for him! i've never before dated a guy where i could honestly say i pictured forever with him (not that i've dated many guys...)...but i truly feel that way now! i still get the "what if's" and the doubts...usually i'm hightailing it for the boarder by now...i think this has also been my longest relationship...and we are coming up on eleven months. but every day is worth it, every moment! he makes me smile, and understands me like no one ever has. i feel like i can be myself with him, and block out the rest of the world. i am definitely a lucky girl!!!

what else?...well, because of the aforementioned boy, i will be moving back to calgary this summer!!! and hopefully i will get into the Bachelor of Education program at the university (fingers crossed!). my life is kind of hanging in the balance at the moment...but really, when has it not been...i tend to fly by the seat of my pants at the best of times...

my life always seems to be about waiting for something to happen...i try and sit back and enjoy the moment, but i'm always looking towards the next event i have planned...

well, that's about all i have to say...that's positive...i still have so much that i'm trying to improve on myself...i've been trying to exercise more and eat better...and i type this as i chow down on chips and dip. i never said that i wasn't self destructive...

well, i think that i'm going to sign off...i've given you all a little look into my life...i might even write more in time...not sure how much time, but sometime...

hope you are all having a great beginning to your year!! here's wishing for sunshine!

Lindsay

what a weekend...

where to start...well, let's start at the beginning of the weekend...

friday: went to work, packed up everything i had gotten together for camping, asked the roommate if she had any plans for the weekend and she said no (remember this for later, it's important), and drove to calgary. spent and evening with my honey running around spending a ton of money.

saturday: woke up early to get a few final things and we were off to camping. we find the place, settle in (quite quickly too, we are a very efficient pair), and start a fire. it was a great afternoon! the sun was shining and we were actually camping, and alone together. we played some catch (where Jon misses one of my throws and catches the ball in the chest), had a few drinks, and mostly just enjoyed each others company! Jon got stung, but fortunately it was only a fly by, and so he didn't react too badly. his arm swelled and he felt off, but no issues with breathing and no trips to emergency, so that was good. it got cloudy and rainy so we played some cards, had a nap, and went back out by the fire when the rain let up. had a great dinner of bison burgers, and headed to bed.

sunday: woke up to find it had rained for most of the night. Jon didn't sleep so well because of his arm, and it was a cold night so of course i didn't sleep so well. we got up and decided that we wanted to cook breakfast, but first we needed to put up a tarp, and get more firewood. we put up the tarp (again, very efficient) and started a fire, got more wood, and proceeded in cooking. tried to use the hand-me-down hibatchi...didn't go so well, so just put the pans directly over the fire, worked much better! i think i'm missing something with the hibatchi, but i will figure it out. so, cooking breakfast, and everything is coming along well, and Jon picks up the sausages off the fire in the metal roasting rack, and his hand slips up the handle and he burns himself...not good...not a big burn, but a painful one on his fingers. so that sucks, but breakfast was great! we sit around the fire for a while, Jon taught me to play crib...almost beat him, but i showed him who's boss at crazy eight count down! and apparently i become a different person when i play cards...i don't believe him, he's just sad cuz he lost...lol...and i'm not competitive at all...so in the afternoon Jon has a nap and i decide to read for a while. it seemed like it was getting nice outside so i went and read in the sun. it was great! when Jon woke up he still wasn't feeling so great (because of the sting) so we went for a little walk to see if fresh air would work. then it looked like the clouds were rolling in again, and Jon wasn't feeling good, so we packed up. went back to his house and hung out with the roommates.

monday: day of rest! what a nice day! Brandon made breakfast, watched some movies, and hung out with my baby all day!

tuesday: go to random doctors appointments in two different cities and come back to lethbridge to find out my roommate moved out over the weekend...now i'm sitting here confused, wondering if i did something that would make her scared to mention to me that she wanted to move out. not sure why she wouldn't tell me. i specifically asked if she had any plans, and she lied to my face! we didn't sign an agreement or anything, i'm not a pushy roommate, i thought we were getting along well...i guess i was deluded...

and i found out i might have irritable bowl syndrome, which is brought on by stress, which i'm guessing is right cuz i'm totally not feeling well, and have a bit of a fever...just need to let it go. whatever. just don't know why she would just get up and leave.

tomorrow: i have to convince my boss to let me go for two more appointments (which i'm not looking forward to, he's been really good about giving me days off, and i'm starting to push my luck...and i'm going to need another day off in september, october, and november...this wouldn't be a problem if they would just give me vacation days from the start)...but hopefully this will be the end of it, and i will feel better. i have to get food for treats for two birthday's at work and get everyone to sign the cards. and i have to catch up on the paperwork i missed today. not that it will take me long, but it has to be done. oh well, no lunch break tomorrow...

okay, i should probably go to bed...maybe read for a while, that will get my mind off things!

hope you all had a great long weekend. sorry for all the venting messages, they will get better i hope. next weekend is birthday celebrations, and i am going to relax!

night!

Lindsay

more pet peeves...

okay, so i know i went on a bit of a rant last time...but i just have two things to add...

caller id...just because you received a phone call from a number doesn't mean that the person on the other end was actually trying to contact you. if they don't leave a message, then it was probably not that important. the most ridiculous thing in the world is when i get a phone call from someone saying "um, someone there called me, do you know why?" of course i don't know! there are 15 people i work with, and most of them are clowns (okay, most of them are boys, and that explains everything) and they may have called you, and they may have accidentally dialled the wrong number, but if they didn't leave a message and you don't recognize the number, then chances are nobody on this end of the phone wants to talk to you! so don't call!!!

and my last one is that if i page a phone call for you, and you don't pick up, but the caller hangs up before i have a chance to get their name or take any sort of message, then i probably don't know who it is. if you ask me if they left a message, and i say the hung up before i had a chance to ask, don't get mad at me for them not having any patience. it's not my fault! i'm keeping track of the calls coming in and people aren't waiting forever to hear a human voice, so if they can't wait for me to come back and say you are busy, that is their problem, not mine!

okay, i'm finished ranting...lol, i know i know, it's all petty stuff, but it does get to a person. it's a good thing i have a short memory, and get over stuff fast!

and Joie, just to let you know, i finally finished my taxes...and it took me all of 30 minutes...i know, i procrastinate too much sometimes, but that's just the way i am...and you love me for it!

well, i'm working way to much, and not sleeping nearly enough, and trying to be somewhat healthy (okay, thinking about trying to be somewhat healthy), and trying to save some money, and trying to come up with some small but amazing trip to take Jon on for august long weekend, because he deserves a break and i love him and i want us to have a little vacation for the two of us. just got the best email from my little sister who is living in Ireland. i'm still completely jealous of her, but at the same time i don't know if i could handle the crazy life she is living. i would definitely not get as much enjoyment out of it as she is! but i'm so proud of her, and she's going to have memories that will last a lifetime!

and i'm reading my crazy long books again. i like them so much! it's so hard to put them down. i wonder if Joie's mom would be willing to part with them for a while...i know that she finds them a little overwhelming...but i love every second. i am a lot like Jon in what i like to read...he always feels like a geek when trying to explain his video game to me, so this weekend i sat him down and started to explain this series that i'm reading, and now i know how he feels, cuz i felt like a comlete dork myself. but if he liked reading, this is something that he would totally enjoy! it would be so neat if someone was to make a movie out of these books, but they would be a million hours long...for each book...and there are 10 or 11 books in the series right now...ya, i don't think that's going to happen. i'm also watching the complete star wars set right now...i'm on movie #5. i'm a geek, i know. at least i'm willing to admit it.

i've been looking into real estate in calgary. just to see what's out there. won't be looking for anything seriously till at least the winter...probably december or january. i know that i told my boss i would stay till march...but i don't know if i can last that long...every weekend when i have to say goodbye to Jon and to my friends and family it gets harder and harder...i don't know what's different, but maybe it's just that i'm in calgary a lot more now and there is way too much to do and way too many people to see in such a short time. and i miss Jon so much. everytime something happens i want to tell him, and when i'm sleeping i search for him on the other side of the bed. i want to be able to enjoy a weekend without having to worry about the travel time. i don't get to rest on the weekends cuz i'm trying to fit a whole week into two days (and sometimes only one day). i don't know...i'll keep you all posted...wish i would just win the lottery or something...

well, i'm gonna go read or something...just relax...have to prepare myself for this weekend...working thursday friday saturday and sunday at oj's (including the monday to friday at eecol) and working a double shift on saturday...it's gonna be a long weekend, but probably very good for my wallet, so i can't complain.

later y'all!! love ya!

Lindsay

pet peeves...

okay, so this may not be a pleasant post, but i need to rant.

what is it with people??? maybe it's just me, but there are things that are driving me absolutely batty these days!

first of all, people who repeat themselves. and not just once, not twice, at least 4 or 5 times! it's like they are a child trying to get the attention of an adult! for children it is understandable, sometimes they need to repeat themselves to be heard, they are just little people trying to make their mark on the world. but when you are an adult, it just sounds desperate! i feel like shouting, i heard you the first time! even when i walk away the repetition follows me...i agreed the first 4 times, do you think i'm going to change my mind?

pet peeve #2: people who go through all the stuff on my desk! i know that i'm just a receptionist, and that i don't make as much as everyone else or are as important, but it is technically my desk, and the stuff on top of it is the stuff i am working with! don't touch! don't go through my inbox, or the other files underneath my inbox that have nothing to do with you! i can't stand it when people do this, what the heck??? i don't go through the stuff on their desks! i don't care if you think it has something to do with you, or if your name appears on the item in which you want to look at...ask me!!! i will explain it to you, or ask you about it!

pet peeve #3: people who sit at my desk, use my phone, and my computer, while i am standing behind them waiting to use my desk, phone, and computer! i don't sit at your computer and use your phone and take up your space when you are trying to work! i don't understand...maybe i create too much of an attachment to inanimate things...

pet peeve #4: this one doesn't have a title, but i do have an explanation...i'm standing in line at the store yesterday, and there are three people in front of me. the guy at the front is paying, the second guy has his stuff on the belt, and the guy in front of me is holding his stuff...now, this doesn't make sense to me...so i'm standing there, unable to decide if i should put my stuff on the belt or not. my concern is that once the second guy's stuff starts to get scanned and put through, my stuff is going to shoot to the front, and the clerk is going to either think that my stuff belongs to the guy in front of me, or that i'm with the guy in front of me (yuck!). he finally realizes that maybe he should put his stuff on at the last moment before all my stuff goes flying past him, and i realize that the guy behind me isn't putting his stuff on the belt! and there are at least two people behind him...i don't understand...

pet peeve #5: people who drive across parking lots without paying attention (not down the lanes, but actually across the stalls). there are lines painted on the cement for a reason! they just go flying through with no thought to the fact that someone might just plow into them at any moment because they are idiots and have no clue as to how this whole driving thing works (and i'm not even going to start on my issue with bad drivers, cuz this would turn into a novel).

okay, i should probably stop my whining. i just had to get that off my chest. i'm sure there are more...

i'm excited for the weekend! a big hike and the stampede!! and i might even do my taxes this weekend...lol...i should probably do that...

okay, well, this is just my lunch break, so i should probably get back to work...

later y'all!

i think i'm growing up...

okay, first of all, i just had a great weekend!!! celebrating cathy's birthday with a day at shakers family fun center, and then a fabulous dinner at Bolero...it was so good!!! and having dinner with my mom and her boyfriend and Jon. it was such a good evening. i really think my mom is finally warming up to the idea of me and Jon together. i knew that she would love him as much as i do once she gave him a chance. he is so amazing, and he loves me so much. it wasn't going to be long until she accepted him. and now she's doing the girlfriend's mom thing and asking him to help out with stuff around the house. and he loves it!

okay, so...me, finally growing up...this whole relationship thing is like a whole new world. i really never understood how a relationship could be like this. i've seen the people around me in their relationships, and can't understand what it was for them to be together, even when they were upset at each other. but still these couples have worked out their issues and are happy together. and it all seemed so ridiculous to me until now. even though i'm still scared, i'm also excited. looking forward to the future is something new to me, and some days it seems to consume me. living so far away is practically torture. that is what Jon said the other day, and it pains me to know that i'm causing that hurt. i know it won't be forever, and i'm sure that i won't be staying in Lethbridge until March. i just want to be able to come home to him at the end of a day of work, and cook dinner together, and be able to do seperate things on the weekend and not feel guilty because it's cutting into the short time that we have together.

and we've been making so many plans. i'm still feeling guilty that i'm taking up all his time, but he keeps telling me that he enjoys every second. well, i guess that if he's not going to complain i should just accept it. i am going to try to make more time for us to spend with brandon and hopefully go and visit his mom and his sister.

well, i should probably get some sleep. i'm finally feeling better and i should probably try to stay that way...lol...goodnight to all you out in blogger land, hope my blog didn't put you to sleep, i know it's not that exciting...

later!

the secret life of the american teenager

this is the title of a new show coming out, with Molly Ringwald acting in it! she doesn't look very old in the preview, but she must be getting up there...i'm very interested in seeing it...tuesday night on abc...someone remind me! Joie, i leave that to you!

well, i'm starting to feel a little better. still pretty tired, but trying to stay up past 7! yay!

watching trading moms...i love this show...so much drama! it's awesome!

can't wait to go to calgary on friday! wanna see my man, and relax, and spend time with my family and friends. i really need to move back to Calgary. it would make all this so much easier.

okay, well, i think i have used up my energy for the day...but this is two posts in a few short days...so you all should be proud of me! lol...i am!

goodnight all...sweet dreams!