okay, jumped on here to write about me.......and i have gone blank...
i'm really excited about greece! 22 days!!! there is so much to see and so little time. it sucks that Jon won't be coming with me, but at the same time it's going to be nice not having to worry about someone else...i am going with my mom and sister, and i will have to worry about them, but i hope it's not too bad. i get to plan where we are going, so that will be good, i hope they both enjoy what i decide to go see.
i can never say what i want to say here...i can't believe i ever thought i could be a writer.......i know what i want to say, it just never comes out right.
i'll write more later, i just can't focus right now....gonna try to make cinnamon buns, could be interesting.....
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
skiing!!!
so, i went skiing on valentines day, and it was amazing!!! i started the day off at the top of the hill, totally scared to go down. i was scared of falling and scared of failing...it took me forever just to make it down the first slope. there was so much going through my head, and i just couldn't focus, and it didn't help that my baby sister was staying with me to keep me company, and not really having fun because i was going so slow. i couldn't concentrate on what i was doing because i could feel her watching me, and i didn't want her to see how badly i was doing. after going down the hill twice with her watching me, i decided to send her down with everyone else. it would make so much more sense for her to go with everyone else than to sit and watch me. she is so sweet, and didn't want to leave me. i am so lucky to have a little sister like her! so off she went with the others, and i was free to make mistakes, to take my time, and to not feel guilty that i was keeping anyone else from enjoying themselves...
so, i pulled up my socks and did the only thing that made sense to me...i followed a little girl who was being guided down the hill by her dad! it was brilliant! she was just a beginner (probably about 7 or 8 years old) and he was giving her very direct instructions as she went down the hill, so i just followed and took his advice! that little bit of teaching helped me so much! after that run, when i made it to the bottom without feeling like i lost control at all, it gave me so much confidence! it seemed like something clicked, like a lightbulb was turned on in my head, and that all the sudden i figured it out! on the next trip down the hill i decided to go for broke. what was the point in holding back! there have been too many times in my life that i haven't taken the chance, that i haven't just jumped! i needed to jump, to prove to myself that i could, so i took off down the hill. i took chances that allowed me to discover that i could do more than i allowed myself to do before!!
i will never forget the exhileration of flying down that hill. i felt so free, even though i was completely terrified at the same time! i kept thinking about how i should be standing, knees bent, hands forward, leaning forward in my boots, pressure to the uphill side of my skiis, snowplow, turn, go!!! then, all of the sudden, the tips of my skiis crossed and i flew over them head first! i'm surprised i didn't injure myself. i remember falling, rolling through the snow, and landing face up, looking at the sky. and i laughed! it was so amazing! just another step in knowing that i could let myself go, and know that i could fall, but that i would survive!
i went down a few more times, and by the last time my legs were so tired i knew i couldn't go again. i think that if i tried, my legs would give out on me and i wouldn't have made it safely down the hill. but i was so proud of myself, and where i had gotten to, that i didn't mind stopping early! i went down to the lodge at the bottom of the hill and had a hot chocolate while reading my book. i felt like i had accomplished so much! i am so proud of myself, and i can't wait to go back next weekend!!
okay, not sure what else to say...i still didn't get flowers for valentines day...not impressed but i don't know how to get him to just do it...i don't know why he fights it. i have bluntly said, "get me flowers" and he just can't do it. he is so good to me in every other way, but it is disappointing that he can't do this little thing for me. he got us matching team canada clothes, took me skiing, heats up my heat pack every night...i don't know why i think i need flowers. but it's just the one thing that he can't seem to make himself do. it seems like a little thing, something that he should be able to easily do! it's not like i'm asking for jewlery or a new wardrobe or anything huge...just some pretty little flowers to tell me he loves me. if anyone out there has any advice for me, let me know...
okay, i'm super tired cuz i haven't had a rest in over a week, so i'm going to go watch xena...season 5 here i come!!! maybe i'll even get on the treadmill for a bit so i can stretch out my sore muscles...there are muscles in my bum that are hurting that i didn't even know i had...
later people!
so, i pulled up my socks and did the only thing that made sense to me...i followed a little girl who was being guided down the hill by her dad! it was brilliant! she was just a beginner (probably about 7 or 8 years old) and he was giving her very direct instructions as she went down the hill, so i just followed and took his advice! that little bit of teaching helped me so much! after that run, when i made it to the bottom without feeling like i lost control at all, it gave me so much confidence! it seemed like something clicked, like a lightbulb was turned on in my head, and that all the sudden i figured it out! on the next trip down the hill i decided to go for broke. what was the point in holding back! there have been too many times in my life that i haven't taken the chance, that i haven't just jumped! i needed to jump, to prove to myself that i could, so i took off down the hill. i took chances that allowed me to discover that i could do more than i allowed myself to do before!!
i will never forget the exhileration of flying down that hill. i felt so free, even though i was completely terrified at the same time! i kept thinking about how i should be standing, knees bent, hands forward, leaning forward in my boots, pressure to the uphill side of my skiis, snowplow, turn, go!!! then, all of the sudden, the tips of my skiis crossed and i flew over them head first! i'm surprised i didn't injure myself. i remember falling, rolling through the snow, and landing face up, looking at the sky. and i laughed! it was so amazing! just another step in knowing that i could let myself go, and know that i could fall, but that i would survive!
i went down a few more times, and by the last time my legs were so tired i knew i couldn't go again. i think that if i tried, my legs would give out on me and i wouldn't have made it safely down the hill. but i was so proud of myself, and where i had gotten to, that i didn't mind stopping early! i went down to the lodge at the bottom of the hill and had a hot chocolate while reading my book. i felt like i had accomplished so much! i am so proud of myself, and i can't wait to go back next weekend!!
okay, not sure what else to say...i still didn't get flowers for valentines day...not impressed but i don't know how to get him to just do it...i don't know why he fights it. i have bluntly said, "get me flowers" and he just can't do it. he is so good to me in every other way, but it is disappointing that he can't do this little thing for me. he got us matching team canada clothes, took me skiing, heats up my heat pack every night...i don't know why i think i need flowers. but it's just the one thing that he can't seem to make himself do. it seems like a little thing, something that he should be able to easily do! it's not like i'm asking for jewlery or a new wardrobe or anything huge...just some pretty little flowers to tell me he loves me. if anyone out there has any advice for me, let me know...
okay, i'm super tired cuz i haven't had a rest in over a week, so i'm going to go watch xena...season 5 here i come!!! maybe i'll even get on the treadmill for a bit so i can stretch out my sore muscles...there are muscles in my bum that are hurting that i didn't even know i had...
later people!
Saturday, February 13, 2010
saturday morning ramblings...
good morning to all you people out there! it isn't that early, but it is way too early for me. yesterday was a busy day....worked all day, then met Jon's grandmother, and then went to see the late showing of Avatar (which was totally worth it, what a great movie!!)
so now i'm up, because my brain is telling me i have a million things to do, but i also have a migraine, and i really need to have a shower, but i'm dreading having to do my hair myself for the first time...i really love the cut, but i'm not sure if i can do it...oh well, i guess i'll find out. and if i can't do it, i'll just have to look like a crazy cat cuz i can't even pull it up in a ponytail (which kinda scares me)...
what can i tell you about my life? well, it's pretty hectic these days. i'm excited that it is reading week, but it is already filling up fast...for starters, i'm working yesterday, today, monday, and friday...we are going skiing tomorrow and next saturday, i've got tuesday, wednesday, thursday to do homework, so that leaves next sunday for relaxing, which we've already planned a day full of watching movies. that should be really good! and Jon got us matching team canada lounge wear, so we are even going to match all day...lol...he is so cute!
Jon and i are doing really great! we seem to be communicating better than we were before, and life doesn't seem so stressful in that area. he is so supportive of me, and i really rely on him sometimes. the only thing that really bothers me is he has this issue about not getting me flowers...i outright tell him that i want flowers, and he just doesn't get them for me...and it's not like he doesn't spoil me, because he does...heck, i just got a team canada outfit! but i just want flowers...it's just a little thing to say that he loves me, and he's listening to me, and he will go out of his way to make me smile...silly, i know, but that's what i want...
school has been really good, but really busy...it seems that if i'm not doing readings for school, then i'm doing a lesson plan, or thinking about my next project or presentation, or reading up on the whole tuition thing, or worrying about money, or working so that i can supplement my student loans...i barely have time for the people in my life, much less the person i live with. sometimes i feel so guilty about not having enough time, but everyone is so supportive, and Jon has been so fantastic. i really want to focus on my health as well, but that seems like a lost cause as well, because i just can't seem to get myself motivated. i am so tired all the time...hopefully one day i will get the chance to slow down...maybe this summer! although that's always on my mind too, because i'm thinking about where i might be able to work, and saving up to go to greece, and hoping that jon can get the time off that week so he can come with me...there is always so much to think about...being an adult sucks sometimes...
well, i think i'm done with the rambling...i figured i'd come on here and say something, since Joie usually gets mad if i don't, but she hasn't been on here since the last time i was, so she can't say anything now!! lol!
oh, i do have one thing to comment on...saw some guys from highschool yesterday...and it was one of those moments that was pretty good (besides the fact that i was working at chapters)...but i was looking pretty good with my new hair do and my makeup all done up...just was a really good moment...
okay people, have a great day...if you are bored come and visit me at Chapters...i'm there until closing...maybe i'll treat myself to a hot apple cider...or a skinny vanilla latte...
later!
so now i'm up, because my brain is telling me i have a million things to do, but i also have a migraine, and i really need to have a shower, but i'm dreading having to do my hair myself for the first time...i really love the cut, but i'm not sure if i can do it...oh well, i guess i'll find out. and if i can't do it, i'll just have to look like a crazy cat cuz i can't even pull it up in a ponytail (which kinda scares me)...
what can i tell you about my life? well, it's pretty hectic these days. i'm excited that it is reading week, but it is already filling up fast...for starters, i'm working yesterday, today, monday, and friday...we are going skiing tomorrow and next saturday, i've got tuesday, wednesday, thursday to do homework, so that leaves next sunday for relaxing, which we've already planned a day full of watching movies. that should be really good! and Jon got us matching team canada lounge wear, so we are even going to match all day...lol...he is so cute!
Jon and i are doing really great! we seem to be communicating better than we were before, and life doesn't seem so stressful in that area. he is so supportive of me, and i really rely on him sometimes. the only thing that really bothers me is he has this issue about not getting me flowers...i outright tell him that i want flowers, and he just doesn't get them for me...and it's not like he doesn't spoil me, because he does...heck, i just got a team canada outfit! but i just want flowers...it's just a little thing to say that he loves me, and he's listening to me, and he will go out of his way to make me smile...silly, i know, but that's what i want...
school has been really good, but really busy...it seems that if i'm not doing readings for school, then i'm doing a lesson plan, or thinking about my next project or presentation, or reading up on the whole tuition thing, or worrying about money, or working so that i can supplement my student loans...i barely have time for the people in my life, much less the person i live with. sometimes i feel so guilty about not having enough time, but everyone is so supportive, and Jon has been so fantastic. i really want to focus on my health as well, but that seems like a lost cause as well, because i just can't seem to get myself motivated. i am so tired all the time...hopefully one day i will get the chance to slow down...maybe this summer! although that's always on my mind too, because i'm thinking about where i might be able to work, and saving up to go to greece, and hoping that jon can get the time off that week so he can come with me...there is always so much to think about...being an adult sucks sometimes...
well, i think i'm done with the rambling...i figured i'd come on here and say something, since Joie usually gets mad if i don't, but she hasn't been on here since the last time i was, so she can't say anything now!! lol!
oh, i do have one thing to comment on...saw some guys from highschool yesterday...and it was one of those moments that was pretty good (besides the fact that i was working at chapters)...but i was looking pretty good with my new hair do and my makeup all done up...just was a really good moment...
okay people, have a great day...if you are bored come and visit me at Chapters...i'm there until closing...maybe i'll treat myself to a hot apple cider...or a skinny vanilla latte...
later!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)