hey stranger

so, i used to surf others blogs to see what they were up to, and frowned when there were no recent updates...and now here i am, with almost a month going by since my last post...oops...

well, life is doing really good! amazing in fact!!! things are going great, and sometimes i'm not sure that it's all real. hopefully one of these days it sinks in...lol...

job is going great! i love it there. everyone is so nice to me! i hope that i'm doing good...some days i feel like i'm useless, but i guess that's the role of the receptionist.

ummm....my friends are amazing! so supportive!

ummm...family is doing great! my little sister turned 21 this week...i feel so old! and she's working in an irish pub, in ireland!!! i'm so jealous! but happy where i am...can't wait to travel once i finally grow up...oh wait, i'm already travelling...i guess that i never need to grow up!!! yay!!!

roomate is doing great! and we have a temporary cat for 2 months...kitty sitting for my sister. it's been okay...the cat is driving me crazy though....i've never seen a cat more desperate for attention! he's literally under my feet all the time, or cuddled up to my side, or meowing to me at the bathroom door...he's crazy! Cathy says he's french...well, i'm beginning to agree!

and that's about all i have to say at the moment, cuz i'm tired (worked both jobs yesterday, and tonight is my resting night...in which i'm cleaning, doing laundry, and trying to play with the cat so he doesn't feel so unloved...). hope you are all doing amazing out there!

Lindsay

update definitely needed!

so, my last post was completely upsetting and miserable, i really need to update it. things are doing good since i was last here. Emily is doing really well, and that kid adapts to any situation like a pro! she is now all about reading the labels and such. she is such an organized little kid, this is going to be no problem for her. she has been totally spoiled (she got guitar hero, new clothes, and tons of attention)...although, she's always spoiled, but she's worth it! i love that kid so much, and i hate needles so much, it's just hard for me to picture having to deal with that every day. but everything is going well, and her only worry is that she's going to put on weight (which she really needs anyways).

okay, so on to other things. job is going really well. my only issue is that when it is slow, i really don't have much to do. i think i surprised the boss today by offering to organize the storage room (boxes everywhere...it's scary). but it's good, and i'm kind of excited to get at it!

foot is doing well! i've actually been running for the last week! it's been great!

life is pretty good at the moment...there are still some wrinkles to iron out, but i'm working on them...not really sure what it is i want or where those wrinkles are located, but i'll find them and work on it.

hope that all you people are doing great!

dying inside...

i don't know what to do...there's noting i can do...one of the most amazing people i know is sick, and there's nothing i can do about it. my baby sister, who lights up every room she is in, who sees good in everyone and everything, who is brilliant and amazing and beautiful, has been diagnosed with diabetes...and i can't make it all better for her. i'm hurting so much for what she has to go through, and i wish i could do it for her. she's only 12. i just want to be there for her, and i can't even do that.

and i feel so selfish for hurting so much, cuz it's her that's going through this...i can't deal with this right now...i just want to go to calgary...

changes...

wow, it feels like my life has been turned upside down. since i broke my foot (exactly a month ago) carolyn has moved to europe, i got a new job (which i start tomorrow), i got a new roomate (who moves in tomorrow), i feel like i've moved every item in my house around at least twice, haven't worked for a month, and my head is just spinning right now cuz i'm getting back into the swing of things, and have to be at work by 7:30 tomorrow morning. i've also made major changes on what i want to do with my future, and feel like i'm actually moving towards something again.

now Joie says she has to find me a man so i don't become the crazy cat lady...lol...i don't need a man...lately i don't know what to think about them. looking at my two best friends, and everyone around me, getting married and having families...it's kind of intense...and everyone knows that i'm not the best with commitment...ya, it's a long story...

so, i can no longer be on the computer 24 hours a day, since i don't have a pc at work (although i have a mighty nice green screen). i'm sorry to all those people out there that i have kept entertained for the last month...i will now be the late night surfer...not sure how i'm gonna keep up with you all now...keep me posted on everything!!! i will miss you!!!

okay...gotta go get some sleep, i actually have to wake up early tomorrow...

Lindsay

back to work..

guess what? i got the job at the place i wanted to work!!! i'm so excited. and i'm going to try and go back to work this weekend at the pub that i'm on injury leave from at the moment, see if i can handle a shift! i'm so excited!!! i can't believe i haven't worked in almost a month...it doesn't feel that long...so yes, it seems that things are settling into place, to allow me to set other plans into motion...

and that's all i have to say for now...woo hoo!!!!

evolving...

so, apparently as you grow, your plans should grow with you...and sometimes that means change. i would think that i, of all people, would be okay with change...i've been all over the place (well, all over Alberta) and i pick up and leave easily. but there is one plan that i seem to be putting off and putting off...and maybe it's time to accept that i need to maybe change that plan. i've been told that i'm putting my life on hold because of these plans, but i've been putting the plans on hold because of life, so really i'm not going anywhere or doing anything, and i'm becoming depressed because i feel like i'm not doing anything with my life...which right now, i'm not. anyways, that's all i have to say about that for the moment...wish me luck out there, hopefully i get the job i am waiting for...i should know by tuesday...

(adding this) a quote i found while reading last night:
Will considered what to do. When you choose one way out of many, all the ways you don't take are snuffed out like candles, as if they'd never existed. At the moment all Will's choices existed at once. But to keep them all in existence meant doing nothing. He had to choose, after all.
- The Amber Spyglass

and my boss at the pub is the best. i know that i complain, because working with her can be stressful, but she has the biggest heart! i told her that i'm going to be working in an office, but i would love to stay working with her, and she just told me to let her know when i can start again. i couldn't imagine not working there right now!

and it looks like i didn't kill my tv after all...lol...my mom is so funny! she was here this weekend picking up carolyn's stuff, and we stopped at walmart for groceries, and she kept trying to buy me stuff...she is so cute! and when she read that i killed my tv, she called me immediately to see if she could get me a new one! i have got to have the best mom in the world! she spoils us all too much, and has an ability for unconditional love that i've never seen in anyone.

my foot is still healing. i hit it as i was trying to step over something today...it was kinda painful...but i don't think i did any more damage to it...i hope not...stupid foot! i just wanna go back to work...

so, i have a new bedroom, and i love it! right now it's a mess, and i have tons to put away, but it's all set up, and it's bigger than the other one! i just love it! i have way too much stuff!!! and now i have to clean and set up the other room for my new roomate! i can't believe she is going to be here in a week! time just flies! and i can't believe i haven't worked in three weeks now! i'm starting to get used to this whole not working thing....i really need to find myself a rich husband, then i could enjoy all this time off, instead of stressing about money, and not being able to go out or to the gym or anything...

well, i've talked enough, and mostly about good things (i hope you are happy...you know who you are)...i hope that you all are doing great!! don't let life get you down, and as Annie says, there's always tomorrow!!!

laters

all right, all right...

it has been brought to my attention that i'm being too negative...and now that i read back, my first two posts are a bit of a downer...

i don't want you people out there to think i'm living in a world of self pity, because that is the last thing i am doing...i like to vent every once in a while...it helps me think things out, and move past them. and i'd just like to say that i appreciate you listening!

okay...so...need to find something good to tell you about...well, i have an interview this week for an office job...hopefully things go well, cuz i could really use a paycheck...and i think my foot is healing nicely (knock on wood) so hopefully i can start moving around more. i have the bestest friends in the world who worry way too much about me...but i'm not gonna complain too much cuz i love it!

i had a great weekend! friday night was the live version of the view at Joie's house (still can't decide who was Barbara Walters...)...saturday went wedding dress shopping with my sister, and then to the post mexico party at Gregg and Krista's (so much fun!) and dinner at my sister's house on sunday night! it seems i get busier and busier...and still accomplish nothing at all...oh well...

it's been a long weekend and i'm tired...so good night to you all!!